


maybe

by dykeforseulgi



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Post TROS, bb-8 and d-o, finnpoe mentioned, leia mentioned, rey's grief, rey's training and force meditation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-20
Updated: 2020-03-20
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:40:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23224918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dykeforseulgi/pseuds/dykeforseulgi
Summary: jessika's been on a mission for the past couple weeks and rey misses her dearly.
Relationships: Jessika Pava/Rey, Reyva - Relationship
Comments: 3
Kudos: 38





	maybe

Rey was in the forest, again. BB-8 and D-O were nearby, getting into trouble in some way or another. Despite their antics below and the noises that come with it, Rey was in a state of pure bliss. 

She hated how it was before. The guidance she lost in Leia was irreplaceable, of course, but she could never truly enjoy it anyway, having the First Order’s impending presence looming over her at all times, causing her to feel at least somewhat uneasy at every waking, and sometimes not waking, moment. 

She missed having someone with her, though. Even when Leia was silent, letting the Force guide Rey rather than herself, just knowing Leia was there was a comfort to Rey, and something she feels she took for granted in the moment. 

Rey tries to reason with herself that this is how things had to be, and replaying the words, “ _No one is ever really gone,_ ” in her head whenever her grief feels like it could bubble over and cause her to just simply give up, but it gets hard sometimes, to remain as logical and practical as she wants to be.

She tried to push these thoughts away when she trained, but she really did miss having some sort of _presence_ there with her that wasn’t a droid. Don’t get her wrong, she adores her little droid buddies with all of her might, but there was no denying that it’s a far different experience having just the two of them rather than Leia there with her.

Rey knows the Jedi live within her, and in knowing that, she knows she’s never really alone, knows Leia will never leave her side, but it certainly doesn’t mean she doesn’t wish Leia was truly there with her again, even if only to give her one last hug or a word of affirmation to get her through the difficult days. 

She decided not to let these thoughts, this mourning, stop her meditation this time. In a way, it almost feels like it makes it better. By channeling these feelings, allowing herself to feel everything in full without suppressing it, she’s opening herself up to so much more than she would otherwise. She doesn’t like being this vulnerable, but as the tears begin to shed, she feels comforted. The tears feel like hugs running down her cheeks and holding onto them, like every life she has lost has inhabited each tear and letting her know that she isn’t alone, that they’ll always be there with her.

During this catharsis, she heard a sound in the distance, the sound of incoming x-wings about to land. Rey tried not to get too excited, wanting to relish in this moment for just a bit longer, but she had to admit that once she recognized the sound, her position floating in the air faltered for a moment, just as her heart did everytime she was around Jessika Pava.

They’d only recently begun seeing each other, and Rey was trying to play it as cool as possible. Once she felt she’d finished her meditation, all she wanted to do was run all the way to the landing pad and envelop Jessika in the hug she felt she so desperately needed, but she just kept telling herself, “Keep it cool, Rey. Keep it cool.”

She decided to let Jessika find her, instead. It wouldn’t be a hard task, Jessika having been given insight into Rey’s favorite spots for meditation and training, but a part of her worried that Jess would have forgotten (though even if she’d lost her way, BB-8 and D-O’s incessant beeps and conversations surely would have lighted the path to Rey), or just simply wouldn’t care enough to come find Rey at all. 

You see, the reason Rey was so adamant about keeping this cool facade up and not allowing herself to leap into Jess’ arms, nuzzle her face into her neck, and never let go was because Jessika had been doing the same thing. Jessika had been acting almost _unbearably_ nonchalant about the whole thing, and Rey wasn’t about to be the first to lose the hard exterior, no matter how badly she wished to.

So, Rey just remained there, in the thick of the woods, still floating, trying her best to remain in at least a somewhat relaxed state, begging whatever Jedi masters were there with her to give her strength in these obviously very trying times. 

A few agonizing minutes passed before Rey heard rustling through the bushes and vines of the forest, accompanied by a calling of her name, clearly coming from the girl she so dearly missed in these last two weeks that the fleet had been on a mission. Her stability once again faltered as her head whipped around at the sound, any semblance left of her concentration finally breaking as the excitement rose in her heart and spread throughout her entire body, practically buzzing from head to toe.

She retained her position in the air despite her now several mishaps, and she quickly turned her head back forward, clasping her eyes shut tight, trying to replicate the peaceful look she had on her face prior to hearing those x-wings. Rey hoped the farce was at least somewhat believable, and she assumed it was when she heard a tiny, “Oh, shoot,” escape from the pilot’s lips upon her finally reaching her desired destination, feeling guilty for interrupting what seemed to be a very intense session of meditation. 

Rey wanted to give it up then in favor of running into the pilot’s arms, but Rey was probably the most stubborn person in the galaxy, or at the very least in this star system. Jessika didn’t make a move, wanting not to disrupt Rey, choosing instead to lean against the nearest tree and appreciate how beautiful Rey was.

The two weren’t _officially_ together, much to their chagrin, especially at the news of this latest mission. It was high risk, some of the remaining First Order troops planning an attack on a planet, a desperate final attempt at gaining some power back. The two recently engaged generals, Finn and Poe, decided it’d be best to send an x-wing squadron out there, Poe leading the team, to take down the troops and gain intel on where they planned to attack next. 

Although the First Order’s numbers had decreased since the fall of the Supreme Leader, there were still a great many committed to the cause with nothing left to lose, making it more dangerous than a typical mission. Jessika wasn’t scared, she had faith in those around her, as well as in her own abilities, but Rey, on the other hand, always worried for her loved ones, which now included the pilot. 

The night before the squadron was supposed to deploy, Jessika took Rey out on a date, hoping to finally ask Rey to be hers (not that Rey’s heart _didn’t_ already belong to Jessika, but it was important to Jessika to make her own feelings known to Rey before she left for her mission). Just as Jessika had taken Rey’s hands into her own and began speaking, though, an alarm sounded. The First Order began their attack sooner than anticipated, and the Resistance had to leave immediately.

Jessika jumped up at the sound, immediately sent into fight or flight mode, a consequence of years of battles and near-death experiences. She snapped out of her panic, looking down at Rey who was still seated, taking her head in her hands, saying, “I’ll be back soon, don’t worry too much while I’m gone, ‘kay?” then placing a long kiss on the Jedi’s forehead before running off to where the rest of the fleet was.

The mission lasted longer than anticipated, which didn’t help to ease Rey’s worries. Even though she always knew Jessika was okay, always able to feel her presence in the Force, she couldn’t help but let her nerves get the best of her. 

Now, with Jessika back, she just wanted to get back on the damn ground. If she’d known Jessika’s reasoning behind being silent and not alerting her to her presence, she may not have minded much, but the waiting was absolutely _killing_ Rey.

After a few more dreadful minutes of Jessika just taking in her surroundings, taking a deep breath in, and relishing in the feeling of being back, reunited with the girl she was starting to fall in love with, she finally said, “You comfortable up there?”

Rey snapped out of her fabricated meditation at the first little blip of sound Jessika had made, her face filling with a smile as bright as all the stars in the sky put together. She, as quickly as she could manage, made her way to the ground and wrapped her arms around Jessika’s neck, while Jessika’s made their way around Rey’s waist, both squeezing tightly. They stayed like this for a good, long while, taking in how they felt in each other’s arms, trying to imprint it in their brains for the next time they would be apart. 

Once the feeling was thoroughly embedded into them both, they seperated just slightly, still in the other’s arms, but far enough that they could see each other’s beaming faces. Rey leaned in, giving Jessika a kiss that had been hanging on her lips for the entirety of the time Jessika had been away. 

“You better not leave me again anytime soon, Pava,” Rey said after the two parted, their foreheads now touching.

“Why’s that?” Jessika feigned ignorance to squeeze a little more softness out of Rey, “You miss me too much?”

“Maybe,” Rey said before pecking Jessika’s lips again.

“That’s all I get? A ‘maybe’?” Jessika joked, “I go out here risking my life, leaving you here all by your lonesome, and I only get a ‘maybe’?” 

Rey laughed and kissed Jessika once more, just to shut her up for a second before saying, “ _Maybe_ I’m starting to fall in love with you.”

Jessika paused for a second, taken aback by the sudden confession, trying to find the right words to say and instead settling for another long kiss on the scavenger’s lips. 

“Maybe I’m starting to fall in love with you, too.”

**Author's Note:**

> i started writing this the day i saw TROS and never finished it but what better time than a quarantine to work on unfinished fics am i right ladies
> 
> twitter: posephdameron


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